Practical ways to control your sexual urge
Although it has destroyed kings, presidents, churches, and homes, the desire for sex is a God-given gift to all humanity. By the Grace of God, we are all sexual beings but it is important to remember that “God’s will is for us to be holy, to stay away from every form of sexual sin” – 1 Thessalonians 4: 3
Failure to control our sexual urges has produced countless children out of wedlock, abortions, abandoned babies, and cases of paternity fraud. A lack of control on this front reminds me of how the Devil comes to “steal, kill and destroy” because NOTHING. BENEFICIAL. comes from it.
Amazingly, the consequence of this hit women harder than any gender. I read about a young lady who got to the point of exploring her sexual life and the result cost her so much. It destroyed her reputation, her destiny got stolen, and she became focused on giving her child a life she never had. Every woman is responsible for who sleeps with her, if you give in to any man this means it was your choice, not a mistake.
My previous post was about why I think people fall into this sin and today I will discuss practical suggestions on dealing with sexual desires. I tag it as my victory plan because this is how I fight to keep myself pure. Sometimes it can be very challenging but persistence and the help of the Holy Spirit are great anchors.
Count the cost of failure – Pros and cons
On a piece of paper list out the pros and cons before making any critical decisions. This will improve your understanding of the situation. Your choice will be objective, not emotional and it will help you avoid decision-making paralysis. This way you’ll be more ready to face whatever comes back at you. Just like on any battlefield; failure is defeat. Can a man walk on hot coals without his feet being scorched? No, list out the consequences and losses for failing to abstain then decide if it’s worth the exercise or not.
Engage your mind to temporarily distract yourself
Doing chores, worshiping, taking a walk, and taking a cool shower will help. Cultivate a mindset of pleasing and honoring God with your imagination. Self-control is a virtue and can be a habit. Renew your thought and ways of thinking, Joshua 1:7-8 encourage us to keep the Word alive in our mind and meditate on it day and night.
Flee from any unnecessary sexual stimuli that can make you compromise
Mediums that curtail sexual activity like pornography, social media, and movies should be avoided. If in a dating relationship, the standard should be cleared. Take note of your triggers and avoid them. Carefully pay attention to your triggers; they could be stress, loneliness, or frustration. Let our eyes look right on, and our eyelids look straight before us Proverbs 4:25.
Cultivate close relationships with accountability partners
These are reasonable people equally grounded in Christ as you. Sometimes sharing is enough to overcome… make sure your accountable person is trustworthy, non-judgemental, and equally cares. When the fight is unbearable, ask them to pray with and for you, for one chase a thousand but two ten thousand. Also, there are accountability applications that you and your accountability partner can install in your phone or laptop which will inform him/her of the sites you visit. If sin is not exposed, it will explode.
Learn to control your appetite
Those who exercise no control over their appetite for food tend to have little control over their sexual appetite. Create time too fast. Uncontrolled eating and drinking are usually linked to all forms of sexual sin.
Conclusion
Thankfully accept your sexual nature; instead of trying to fight your desire, gladly offer it to God. Anticipate the desire because it is a part of you. Do not deny or repress your desires, treasure them and in the strength of God, wait until He leads you to your lifelong awaited partner. In the main time redirect your sexual energies into useful service to the Lord. For the married, those who travel extensively without their spouse have a greater risk of falling into sexual sin. They are far away from home and the restraints of the wife or husband are not there. You should, therefore, expect temptation and take the appropriate steps to prevent it. Such steps include; not being close to anyone of the opposite sex.
I hope you find this helpful. As you practice these simple ways to keep yourself, I pray that you conquer to the very end.
